Is Equal What’s Right?

Dividing Your Estate Among Children

Many parents assume they should create a will or trust that gives every child or grandchild the same amount, distributed in the same way. However…

Estate plans based on equality often lead to unhelpful results, sometimes doing more harm than good.

Perhaps one of your children handles money responsibly, while another finds it irresistible to waste or give away. Maybe some of your heirs require extra assistance or timed distributions for educational expenses, raising young families, health issues, or other special needs. Or perhaps you’re passing down a business or farm where the continued operation requires significant dedication, skill, and capital.

Dividing an estate among children is a complex issue, and there is no one-size-fits-all solution. So, how can you identify the best structure for you?

1. Think big picture. Pray for God’s wisdom as you consider your overarching goals. How might you continue to teach, equip, protect, and provide for your loved ones when you go to be with the Lord? In what ways can you bolster their faith and strengthen their relationships? Are there Kingdom causes you want to support beyond your lifetime? Your planned distributions should reflect the same beliefs and core values that have guided your life.
2. Seek wise counsel. Speak with a trusted advisor—preferably one who shares your Christian worldview—to help you identify the best planning solutions for your circumstances and goals. They can walk you through essential considerations and tax-wise giving solutions so more of your God-given resources will be passed to the people and causes that matter most to you.
3. Document your plans. Your intentions mean very little if they aren’t legally documented. Put your plans into writing and share the location and details of your important documents with those who will execute them on your behalf.
4. Communicate your intentions. Uncertainty breeds chaos! Consider holding a family meeting where you can share your heart and the details of your plan with those most directly affected. You’ll provide a great gift to your loved ones by protecting them from the confusion and conflict that too often arise from “surprise” revelations.

Don’t make the mistake of settling for an “equal” but counterproductive plan! With careful consideration, wise counsel, proper documentation, and open communication, you can develop a plan for your loved ones that is more than fair; it’s right.

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This content is written as part of Generosity Today (2025, Issue 3).